GIVEAWAY and STEAMY EXCERPT: Being Kalli by Rebecca Berto
Published on December 2013 Genres: Contemporary, New Adult, Romance
Kalli Perkins makes it a habit of shutting her mouth, except to please a guy. She would say she goes off like a starved animal in bed, but Kalli doesn’t have sex in beds. She does it in hallways, in parks, in parties. She comes as a package deal.
Great sex. No strings attached. Never alone together; always in public.
One night at a party, Kalli makes a bet with her friend, Nate, that could change everything. But she didn’t count on him. Nate’s very capable of satisfying her, not only under her clothes, but in her heart, too.
She just doesn’t know it yet.
“Anyway,” she says shifting on her leant elbow, “what did you do with Nate?”
“I sucked his cock.”
Scout’s mouth explodes with air. Literally, she bursts into hysterics and I don’t bother reeling her in. The twins’ bedroom is far enough away, and I’m again feeling drunk enough to not know if she’s too loud.
“I did. It was a bet thing anyway.” Why not? Suck your best friend’s cock for a bet. “You sucked some random girl’s tits.”
Scout tips her head in a touché way. “But I like her.”
“I don’t like him. And he’s not even my best friend, you are. So be quiet and satisfied.”
“I’ll make sure not to tell him that, Kalli. But this crosses a line. Are you going to date him or something?”
I make an icky face. “No way.”
“He’s not like you. Shit, Kalli. Both him and I are not like you. We get real messy when we cross that line. Just don’t expect it to work out so well for him.”
“I kiss you.”
“You like guys though, not girls. There’s a fine, but defining difference there.”
“Ah, boy. You’re soft. It’s fine. I know it’ll be fine because he was piss-ass drunk. He may not even remember.”
I lean in, hold her cheeks in place and kiss her lips. “See? I just kissed you, too. I’m not going to pretend my world has changed because I kissed my female best friend or gave head to my male friend. I have bigger concerns.”
I make a mental list: Mum’s a druggie, the twins’ dad has to be reminded to see his kids, I don’t know how I’ll ever pay off my course debt, I have to work part-time, study and mother my little brothers.
Yeah, I have bigger issues.
“Oh but the best part—” lie “—was finally hooking up with Donovan.”
She takes the bait.
“Donovan Xander. That guy in some of your lectures and who you see at parties?”
“Better kisser than I expected. I didn’t give him much credit going in but he obviously gets around. He was great. He even wanted to take me somewhere private—”
I stop there because I can’t explain the reason why, and don’t want to initiate conversation beyond “I can’t”—even with Scout. For some reason, I leave out the part about him having a girlfriend (maybe, probably). I leave out the part that he’s just another guy.
It’s not that I’m a Strong Woman and I-Don’t-Need-No-Man and such. And it’s not that I’m so picky I’m waiting for Mr Right. I had one boyfriend when I was almost fifteen and stupid, and he went around telling our high school year that I jerked him off, for only $10. Both were not true, and it only reinforced what I knew about boys.
Maybe it’s ‘cause Scout is drunk but she takes my words the wrong way.
“Aw, Kalli. Maybe one day. Maybe one day you’ll allow him to take you to his room alone.”
No, that’s the thing; that will never happen. With anyone.
The air is getting hotter between us as we huddle together, breathing heavily. It’s a mix of alcohol from our drinks during the party coupled with the stuffy feeling that puts me on edge.
“It was a one off.”
“It might be nice to see where this goes. You’re lucky to have so many people wanting you, free to be with whoever.”
I shake my head, what?
“Some religions and societies aren’t so accepting. But your mum, Nate and I—we just want you to be happy.”
“Have ‘fun’, you mean,” I say, quoting Mum. “Anyway, tell me more about this chick.”
Scout tells me her name, Steph, what she’s studying, and some general interests, but within no time she’s dead to the world.
Since she’s out, I feel lonely again. Mum still isn’t back, and the only things that will calm me right now are Seth and Tristan. I need to hold them.
In the end I peel Tristan from under the sheets, carry him over to Seth’s single bed and sleep head to toe with them, me curled up at the bottom, so hopefully they still have enough room.
For as much as I struggle sleeping after drinking and parties, tonight is like every other when I come to sleep here.
I’m out before I have to start trying to sleep.
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